Dish DVR Lets You Skip the Football And Watch Nothing But Super Bowl Ads

If you're one of the many Americans who couldn't care less which group of grown men is better at surprise bear hugs and rolling in the grass, Dish DVR is granting you a big Super Bowl surprise with Reverse AutoHop. Now, you can cut out all that garbage football from this year's Super Bowl, and gorge yourself on… » 1/29/15 3:02pm Thursday 3:02pm

Comcast Changed Customer's Name to "Asshole Brown" But Is Totally Sorry

When Ricardo Brown from Spokane, Washington got his most recent bill from Comcast, he had an extra special reason to be dismayed. It wasn't the pricey charges—we're all used to that by now. No, it was that on this particular bill, Comcast appears to have misspelled his name. By replacing it entirely with the word… » 1/28/15 6:17pm Wednesday 6:17pm

Deepak Chopra Has the Worst Avatar Ever on Twitter

Deepak Chopra, online werewolf and mortal nemesis of Gizmodo's Matt Novak, wants you to know the possiblities are infinite. A message he decided to share with the world using the only medium that matters anymore—his Twitter avatar. The possibilities are so infinite, in fact, that he has freed himself from the shackles… » 1/28/15 2:33pm Wednesday 2:33pm

(Mock) Mars Mission Comes to (Mock) Tragic End Thanks to (Real) Fire

The brave men and women living in a (mock) Martian base (in Utah), have met a (mock) brutal and fiery end. After an (actual) greenhouse fire sent flames soaring up 10 feet into the air, our (mock) astronauts have been laid to rest (in their respective homes as they see fit). Goodbye and godspeed, you magnificent… » 1/28/15 1:30pm Wednesday 1:30pm

Guy Who Crashed Drone Into White House Lawn Was a Drunk Govt Employee

Remember how the White House was in lockdown yesterday morning after a rogue DJI Phantom drone crashed into the lawn? According to The New York Times, the perpetrator was National Geospatial Intelligence Agency employee who'd been drinking and droning at a nearby apartment. Which, hey, it happens. » 1/27/15 2:30pm Tuesday 2:30pm

Which Religions Are Prepared to Accept Life in Space?

Assuming we don't blow ourselves up before then, colonizing other planets may be the last hope for the survival of humanity. Most of the preparation for this cosmic expansion has centered around solving the more immediate, physical problems of transporting our bodies into deep space, but what about our culture?… » 1/27/15 11:00am Tuesday 11:00am

This Is the Vajankle, a Fleshlight Foot You Can Fuck

Just like the human/avatar ladyparts on which they're modeled, fleshlights come in all sorts of wacky shapes and colors. But if and when making love to a plastic robot vagina starts to lose its thrill, Sin Boutique is here to cushion your deep, dark fall with the latest solo sex substitute. In the form of a foot. You… » 1/23/15 3:13pm 1/23/15 3:13pm

Report: The Apple Watch Will Only Last 2.5 Hours With "Heavy" Use

We've heard rumors for some time that Apple's been less than pleased with the purported battery life of its upcoming Apple Watch. And now, it looks as though it has plenty of reason to be worried. According to a new report from 9 to 5 Mac, the Apple Watch the battery is looking at just 2.5 to 4 hours of "active… » 1/22/15 3:36pm 1/22/15 3:36pm

10 Bizarre and Horrifying Sex Patents (NSFW)

Depending on who you talk to, the future of sex may be teledildonics. Or virtual reality. Or painfully hot fleshlights. But the one thing almost everyone can agree upon? The future of sex is not a pump-action dildo you strap to your chin. Nor is it any of these other bizarre, terrifying, and wonderfully weird… » 1/21/15 2:08pm 1/21/15 2:08pm

What Time Is the Super Bowl Blog Commercial? 

Super Bowl commercials! All the blogs are doing it, including Gizmodo blogging editor Eric Limer's own Blogtown USA. You don't even need millions of dollars, all you need is this beautiful, rights-free track by The 126ers. Make sure to watch all the way to the end—the most important notes are the ones you don't hear. » 1/20/15 7:00pm 1/20/15 7:00pm

Cops Have Used a Secret Radar That "Sees" Through Walls for Two Years

A new device that can "see" through walls using radio waves started stirring up privacy concerns in a federal appeals court just last month. And it's about damn time; according to a recent report from USA Today, over 50 law enforcement agencies have secretly been using the new radars for the past two years. » 1/20/15 10:59am 1/20/15 10:59am